“Well, I’d like to help you, ma’am, but I’m afraid there’s no law against mailing threatening letters.” – Chief Wiggum
“I’m pretty sure there is.” – Marge Simpson
“Ha, the day I take cop lessons from Ma Kettle-” – Chief Wiggum
“Hey, she’s right, Chief.” – Lou
“Well, shut my mouth. It’s also illegal to put squirrels down your pants for the purposes of gambling . . . boys, knock it off!” – Chief Wiggum
